Celebrating Dave Pearson

“This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet.”
Rumi

1618288_10152277762450318_5614038683655496594_oOne year ago today our beloved friend, Dave Pearson passed away. I can’t believe it’s already been a year. We have a family ritual that whenever we see birds flying we celebrate him. My son will say: There’s Davey! I will pause and smile and say: There he is. Soaring through the sky!  My heart smiles and cries at the same time.

The tears roll down my face thinking about him. Feeling so much love for him and his wife and for Life. What a gift it is to be alive!! What a gift. And, that man celebrated life. Bigtime!! 🙂

Today I honor and revel in 1934518_118477035317_7042737_nhis spirit. His spirit lives on in each one of our hearts. I have been changed by being in his presence. He is embedded into the very fiber of my being. That never dies.

May I be courageous enough to live the lessons he so generously taught me! I can’t hear him laugh or get a giant bear hug from him but I can play these and laugh and connect to his joy. 🙂


I wrote this a few days after his death (reading it made me feel closer to him):

The art of letting go…I can’t say I am thrilled about learning this lesson. I know it’s one we all need to learn. And, sometimes it just hurts my heart. One of our dear friends David Pearson passed on October 28th in a speed flying accident. It was devastating for so many. He has been one of our biggest supporters with en*theos – as an investor and a part of the team. He’s always had pure enthusiasm for everything we’ve ever done. 

I k10712843_10205409621298917_5555399648809237825_nnow you can’t control life and who lives and who dies but this just felt way too early. Waaaaay too early! I want to believe that everything happens for a reason. And, it’s hard to accept. How could someone so full of life die at 38 years young? I want to believe he is soaring on the other side and yet it feels really hard to let go and let him fly. 

They say there are 5 stages of grief: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression + Acceptance. I so wanted to deny it. I got off the phone and didn’t want it to be real. How could that happen? No. No. No. Listing all the reasons that God couldn’t take a person like Dave from the world. I thought of his wife and my dear friend. I couldn’t breathe. My heart broke open. I couldn’t even imagine her process. I wanted it to all go away. I wanted him to come back. I wanted him to be OK. I wanted him to get up after he fell to the ground. Open his eyes, take a deep breath and smile. Awww Dave!! Living the life doing what he loved!

I’ve gone through moments of all 5 stages. Asking questions like: How did it happen? Why did his equipment malfunction? Could we have done something? Why did it have to happen to him? Why did he have to love speed flying so darn much? I experience fear, anger and sadness and then so much love. He loved life. He was such a passionate and fun soul. We were kindred spirits both being a 7 on the enneagram, full of curiosity and + our love of play! 🙂

I smile thinking of 3 moments I loved dearly and will forever cherish. The first is 11206802_10204906082864082_683228341288346941_othe the day I met him. It was just over 7 years ago when Brian and I first started dating. I stopped at B’s house and Dave was there. I remember thinking I dig this guy. B’s got awesome friends. 🙂 Every time we got together there was lots of laughter and joy. So many great memories! I can hear his laugh now! #‎Bestlaughever‬

The second moment was when I was 6 months pregnant and he came with us to get our first ultrasound. It was me, Brian, Uncle Dave + Zoey (our dog who passed last month.) He filmed it and took pictures and celebrated in the health of our sweet baby boy, Emerson! I remember him being so grateful and honored to be a part of it. I loved that he was there! His enthusiasm was off the charts amazing and I can still feel how happy he was for us.

1397391_10203787552941533_7757834811718594802_oThe last and most powerful moment in time was when he married Beth. Brian and I were in the wedding party. I was like 8 months pregnant. The joy on his face as he stood there looking at his bride. Breathtaking. So much love, radiance and happiness.

I remember sitting there envisioning decades of happiness as a married couple. It was the happiest I’ve ever seen him. He was just beaming with light and the kind of love that can only be radiated when you’re marrying your soulmate. Pure love, beauty and joy!

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(Blessing the wedding rings with little E in my belly)

As I reflect on who Dave was for me this is what comes…He was one of those gooooood guys! One of those people that everyone *loves*. You felt like having fun just being around him. So full of life and adventure and always pushing his edges of growth in all areas of his life.

He was an explorer. He inspired and he loved  and he cared for so many. Every time I was with him I felt important. He had a way of being with you that you felt like you truly mattered. He loved people. He could connect with anyone, anywhere, anytime. He genuinely cared. He was one of those friends that if you needed him he’d be there. Oh, and I always appreciated that he thought everything I cooked was awesome. 😉

1016886_10153316377223242_7701237387055295650_nThese are some of the lessons he taught me that I will carry with me:

1. Laugh big, hard & often!! 🙂 He had one of the best laughs. Such a wonderful childlike spirit!

2. Live fully. Live your life like a grand adventure. Explore it all with curiosity, joy and enthusiasm.

3. Love deeply. The love he had for his wife, family and friends was inspiring and touching. Everyone loved Dave. How could you not!? 🙂

4. Love and appreciate our planet. He loved being out in nature. It was his element and he thrived and delighted in all her beauty and did his best to be a good steward by being as conscious as possible.

5. Be grateful for all the awesomeness that is life. It’s the simple things in life. Savor them. Appreciate them. Delight in it ALL!

He was a big fan of Vipassana Meditation. I’ve done 2 ten day meditation retreats and one thing that is said over and over again is: “Anicca, Anicca, Anicca.” This is a Buddhist term that means impermanence. It reminds us that “all of conditioned existence, without exception, is transient, or in a constant state of flux.” Just like the breath rises and falls so does everything else. Everything passes. I’m doing my best to practice. To breath deeply and surrender to Life unfolding…accepting reality…embracing the mystery and trying not to resist and grip.

Some moments are better than others. Some moments I smile and some moments the tears run down my face. I cry because I will never see that smile again or get a 1797378_10152167090100318_1248667039_nhug from him…I cry for his wife, Beth…I cry for all of his family and friends…I cry because Emerson won’t be able to play with his Uncle Dave as he grows up…I cry…then, I come back to my breath. Breathing in and breathing out. Breathing in and breathing out. I breathe it all in and I let it all go.

Mr. Dave Pearson, I am sending you so much love and gratitude! It was an honor to dance and play with you while you were here. Every time I see a bird soaring in the sky I will think of you. The world was a better place because you were here!! Blessings on your next adventure. I love you!


365 days later and I still wish he was here. I have thought about him, his wife and his family a lot in the last year. I know this is the cycle of life and yet I miss him. I kept the last few texts I received from him…holding on to the thread of connection not wanting to let him go. For weeks after he died I would call his cell phone just to listen to his voice. It really is the little things we miss the most. I cry as I look at the lessons he embodied and I think: Thanks Davey!! He is still inspiring me to live out loud.

This evening we went for a family hike. I watched as my son played so freely and reveled in the beauty of the natural world, just like Dave did. I looked up in awe of the mountains and the sky. Smiling and holding him in my heart. He knew what Rumi meant: This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet.

The best way that I (we) can all celebrate his life is to embody the energy and passion for life that he so exuberantly demonstrated. I feel grateful to have known the one and only, Dave Pearson. May his light continue to inspire us all!

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Magical & Miraculous Love List

There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle; you can live as if everything is a miracle.
Albert Einstein

These are a 9 of my favorite experiences from last week:

❤ My son turned 3 years old. What a beautiful journey. He is the light of my life. He inspires me to rise up and be who I am (even more). His birthday is also a celebration of my initiation into motherhood. I was forever changed the day he was born. I gave birth at home in our bedroom and it was one of the best and most powerful days of my life. Motherhood can be such a vital expression of our creativity as mothers (in my humble opinion). In many ways this “art” form is raising me as much as I am raising my child.

I interviewed the late incredibly glorious Gabrielle Roth (creator of 5 rhythms) about 7 years ago and one of the things that stayed with me was how much she said having her son transformed her. While most of her friends were going off to be with gurus, going to mediate in the Himalayas and seeking enlightenment she decided to have a child.  I’ve remembered and thanked her for her wise words over and over the last 3 years.

Motherhood has been one of the biggest spiritual practices of my life. Everything that we need for spiritual awakening and growth happens in the day to day life with a child. If we are willing to see it…it’s all there and we can grow from everything (yes, even the laundry, the crying, the night wakings, the boundary testing, and all the attention and care that is needed to help these little people thrive). This is where we see what we’re made of, we see our cracks that need some extra lovin’, and we embody our power and gifts. Children help us see deeper into who we truly are.

❤ This is one of my favorite miraculous moments ever. So…I’ve been reading Dr. Daniel Amen and loving his brain wisdom. I was talking to my husband on Sunday about wanting to go to one of his clinics to get a SPECT scan so I can see how my brain is functioning.

Monday morning Dr. Amen serendipitously emailed Brian about his revised and updated book: Change Your Brain, Change Your life that will be coming out soon. Long story short, Brian told him about my 2 seizures and mold and we are both going to do scans and do a consultation with him next week.

Whhhhaaaat!?! Totally jazzed and over the moon grateful! He is literally the *perfect* doctor for me to see. He is one of the world’s best in his expertise on brain, mold and thyroid function. I am in awe and definitely did a big happy dance when we booked our appointments! 🙂

❤ Taking a walk one morning with my son and our dog at 6:45 am. Aaaaammmmazing! Beautiful reminder of the simple joys of life. The glorious sun, the fresh crisp morning air, the vibrant trees…life really is a grand adventure. There was such a joy, lightness and freedom that moved through all of us as we played in the early morning radiance. An early-morning walk is a blessing for the whole day. — Henry David Thoreau

❤ I also loved this TED talk about Jane McGonigal called: The game that can give you 10 extra years of your life. She found herself bedridden and suicidal following a severe concussion, she had a fascinating idea for how to get better. She dove into the scientific research and created the healing game, SuperBetter. She explains how a game can boost resilience — and promises to add 7.5 minutes to your life. My take away: It’s all a game. Have fun. Be you. Play full out. Losing is part of the game. Express yourself + be creative. Let yourself be happy!! #boom

Elizabeth Gilbert interviewing Brene Brown on Big Strong Magic!   Sooooo gooood! Elizabeth is the The author of BIG MAGIC and Brene Brown, is the author of RISING STRONG. This talk is about how essential creativity is for healthy, wholehearted living. I listened to it while rebounding and had to stop a few times to take a few deep breaths with tears in my eyes. I *loved* Brene’s book and I am just starting to dive into Big Magic.

❤ I got a few “passionate” dislikes and comments on my video about no longer being vegan. This wasn’t the most magical or miraculous thing (ha) but what I loved about it was my emotional process. I observed as I felt pissed off and then a softening happened and I saw it all with compassion. Compassion for myself and for the people who criticize.

I then decided to watch the video. While watching it I felt proud because I think it’s an important topic. I felt a strong resolve to continue to express my truth even if it goes against everything I believed to be true last year (month, day). I felt the freedom and flexibility that comes from being willing to experiment. “All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

❤ Cranialsacral session the other day. I am relatively new to cranialsacral work. My intention was to remove physical and emotional obstacles that may be constricting the flow. I had a profound experience as she was doing her “work”.

Last year at this time our dog was attacked at the beach. In our session the image of our sweet dog dying presented itself. I viscerally felt the fear, the helplessness and sadness gripping in my body. I acknowledged it and I let it be there. Then, something shifted, I felt a release. I realized I didn’t want to hold on to the fear any more.

She died, there is nothing I can do to change that. I can wish it didn’t happen but that won’t bring her back. I then had the realization that I didn’t want to send her off to the light with my worry and helplessness…I wanted to send her off with love. My heart broke open as tears filled my eyes. I had a sweet chat with her and the floodgates of love flowed through me.

This didn’t make all the sadness go away as I went through the whole experience again but what it did do was let me bring more love into my body and soften the fear and smile as I said a goodbye prayer with a heart full of gratitude remembering: Life and death are one thread, the same line viewed from different sides. — Lao Tzu Thank you sweet Zoey for giving so much. I love you.

❤ This blog. Grateful to have a place to share my stories, passions and life. I do it for the love of it. I do it because I’m called to do it. It’s a sacred space to share my creativity and it makes me smile. It feels good to be back in the game after years of not blogging. There is peace in knowing I am doing what I am here to do. I am honoring my sacred contract with my soul. Sometimes celebrating the magic lies in the simplicity. The simple creations may not seem like that big of a deal but they are. The way we choose to live our life is our greatest art. Zeus

❤ This morning in my meditation practice. I felt really supported and loved. I have an amazing support system. And, I had tears feeling the love and joy. I savored the grateful overflow. My dog must have been feeling it too because he rested in my lap. I felt like I was wrapped in a beautiful blanket of support. #grateful

Magic, Miracles + Love Abound,

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Bliss Diary – June 14, 2015

Life and death are one thread, the same line viewed from different sides. — Lao Tzu

What’s on my mind:
I’ve been thinking about our dear friend who passed 7 months ago in a speed flying accident. Feeling his humor, joy and adventurous spirit. His mother posted the picture below on her Facebook page. I was touched and inspired. Made my heart open, cry and smile.

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All is well. Yes, all is well. I am also aware of the pain that so many go through. Part of life is death. We all feel pain and loss. It’s part of the human experience. I choose to celebrate this life I have been gifted. I know I have a choice on how I live my life. I always have a choice. I want to be awake and present to the miracles happening all around me. Now and always.

There is a part of my that can feel the gripping and the desire to control it all. Knowing that I can’t. I can show up with love and live my greatest life to the best of my ability. Some of those days will feel epic and some of those days won’t. Today I’m feeling into the preciousness and the sacredness that is our life. My heart and my thoughts are with those whom are suffering and grieving a loved one.

May we all feel loved, connected, cherished and honored for who we are. May we live authentically and powerfully. May we shine as brightly as we can for as long as our bodies are alive.


Affirmation/Intention: Breathe deeply. I choose to be aware of my breathe. Breathing in and breathing out. I soften my body and mind. I am peace, ease and grace.

Nutrition:
*
cacao tea (longevity tea, cacao butter/powder, coconut milk/oil, collagen,
FullSizeRenderpeppermint oil + stevia)
*strawberries + mulberries from local farmer’s market
*mixed greens/romaine salad w/avocado, dulse, nori, lecithin, coconut aminos, lemon juice + green juice (E helped make it and took this picture ;))
*
cacao muffins (still working on this recipe will share soon. It’s soooo good! :))
*left-over sunday — salmon + cauliflower rice + spinach

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Movement: 90 minute yoga class + family walk/adventure to the park + 20 min myofascial release on foam roller

Meditation: 20 minutes


Gratitude + Appreciation:
I feel grateful for our farmer’s market. It’s amazing! I am grateful for clean water to drink. I am grateful for beautiful and inspiring music. I am grateful for yoga and our local studio. I am grateful for all the information that is available on nutrition/health/spirituality/etc. So empowering. I am grateful for the Internet and that ability to connect with so many like minded people. I am grateful for memoirs. I love them! 🙂 I am grateful for my son’s curiosity. I am grateful for my husband’s commitment to creating extraordinary value in the world. I am grateful for Dave Pearson. I miss you. Thank you for showing me all the ways one can live fully. I miss your laugh, our fun banter and your joyful spirit. And, lastly I am grateful for you. Thank you for joining me on this journey. I send you love! ❤

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Fearing Less & Living More (after loss)

This video is about my process of loss. I shared (w/ some tears) on how I worked with fear and opened up to live and love more through the loss of our dog and our dear friend.

Here is the quote I share in the video:

This is the true joy in life, the being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; the being a force of nature instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy.
I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the whole community, and as long as I live it is my privilege to do for it whatever I can.
I want to be thoroughly used up when I die, for the harder I work the more I live. I rejoice in life for its own sake. Life is no “brief candle” for me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got hold of for the moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.

– George Bernard Shaw